My second miscarriage happened on a Tuesday night. I missed work Wednesday and Thursday. I was back to work on Friday. Monday was a paid holiday. On Tuesday, I was fired for having a second miscarriage. I know, I know, that has to be illegal. And it is.
I immediately set up an appointment with the equal employment opportunity commission in Chicago. They told me that had this happen two years ago(before little Bush ruined this country) when they still had the man power and funds, they would have taken on my case. They did give me the legal right to sue, but I cannot afford that.
I should probably give you background information. I was working as a therapist at a community mental health center in a north shore suburb of Chicago. I had been there for over a year when I first got pregnant. When I told my boss I was pregnant her exact words were "Couldn't you have used a fucking condom? Why are you doing this to me?" I actually found myself apologizing to her. I now know that should never have happened. I should never EVER apologize to anyone for being pregnant. I was shocked.
A couple of weeks later, during a staff meeting that I was not at, my boss took it upon herself to tell everyone that I was pregnant. I was not at the meeting because I was at a Dr. appointment. When I got into work, a bunch of people kept saying congrats. I finally asked and they told me what had happened. I was livid! I was only 6 weeks along. I had told a few people there, but did not want the whole center to know. Then low and behold less than a week later, I was having a D and C because I lost the baby.
Since that time, I was treated differently by my boss and some of my co-workers. Complaints started coming up about my paper work or calls that were said to not have been returned, when I never got the message. I know I was doing my work, I was keeping track of it for this very reason. My boss, who was once very inappropriately intimate with me in the details she shared with me about her life, started to become rude towards me. I did my best to let it all pass. I kept telling myself, I only have a while longer here. I was staying there because I needed my boss to sign off on my hours to I could get my second therapy license. Luckily I had her sign off on them just before I was fired and did end up getting my license during the two months I was unemployed.
I was told I was being let go due to the economy. It was a small non profit organization and the state had cut back part of the funds they give to the center. But I knew what was going on. This happened three days after I return from having a second miscarriage. My boss was nasty to me since I was pregnant the first time...the math was easy. I later found an add for my job that was posted the day after my miscarriage. Economy my ass!
It was a huge blessing in disguise. I was able to study for my exam and I passed it with flying colors. And I no longer worked for a corrupt organization that I really was not happy with anyways.
We took some time off of ttc (trying to conceive). My OB had told my RE what happend and we scheduled a follow up appointment. We did not get great news. The RE wanted to do alot of testing. We thought, okay, sure. We have good insurrance. The catch? They only used a lab that was experimental and not covered by insurance. Oh, shit. Trevor is a 5th grade teacher, and I am a therapist. Put the two together and you do not add up to much. The tests were going to cost around 6k. We bought our house a year before and with my job loss we were hurting. I was heartbroken once again. I thought to myself, this may never happen, We may never have a child.
We did alot of thinking and talking to our family. We decided to go ahead with the tests. Whats one more credit card ay? So this past summer the tests were done. The results came back in August. We found out that I have thrombophilia, a blood clotting disorder. The baby died because a blood clot cut off the oxegyn to the baby. The treatment for this is baby asprin, Vitamin B6, and prescription strengh folic acid. Once you are pregnant, you then have to inject yourself daily in the stomach with lovenox which is a blood thinner.
I was not happy with all of this. I felt my PCOS was enough to handle, but now this. And to think, I was on birth control pills for years and could have had a very bad clot. Thank god I seem to only get microscopic sized clots...or mayby not since it did kill our baby. So, we move forward.
Friday, January 15, 2010
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